what do you think? are they trying to tell you something?
I've been having intense recurring dreams with the same theme, esp this week.
On Sunday, I saw something that triggered a strong emotional response. One that was also physical. I don't want to go into detail, but this has only happened one other time in my life. Over the same 'issue'...
I've always had dreams of running away from something and hiding..in the past I could go to my neighbor's house and hide in her 'fixed up' attic. (no dark attic for me, it was always luxurious) I could see what that meant, as my neighbors were a strong, Christian family...and I always felt safe with them. IRL, I 'hung out' at their home as much as I could. They are a big reason, not because of their preaching, but because of how they lived their lives that I am a Christian.
Then as a mother, I had consistent dreams of running away from something and trying to protect my dd...I figured it was because she is/was a strong willed child and I not only had to protect her from the 'world' but also from herself.
but after this 'trigger' incident, the dreams are back and much more intense. I am still protecting a girl, sometimes a young one, sometimes older...but she is now indescript, no longer identifiable as my dd...
last night was a li'l different...I actually turned around and fought back. I had these hooked shaped knives and though I kept slicing and stabbing, he would not die. If you wanna know what he looked like, he looked a li'l like the dad in Happy Days...odd, I know. He ended up defeating me, and I ran down a cliff. I think, I managed to roll into a crevice...but that my have been my 'awake' mind changing the ending. All I felt was fear that he would not die...and failure that I could not save the girl.
There was another recurring theme dream in my life, but those have faded. Maybe I'll go into them in another post.
So, what do you think? Did I fight back this time because of the changes I've made in my life, to take better control..esp with the eating and exercise. I do feel like I am changing in more ways than just losing the weight.
Should I show courage next time , and not run?
okay do I have courage to hit the post button...aye yi yi!